Do You Want To Know What Makes Me Laugh?

“Do you want to know what makes me laugh?” Jeanne Peck asked, wielding a sheet of paper. “This makes me laugh” and she proceeded to read the following poem.

On The Vanity Of Earthly Greatness

By Arthur Guiterman

The tusks which clashed in mighty brawls

Of mastodons, are billiard balls.

The sword of Charlemagne the Just

Is Ferric oxide, known as rust.

The grizzly bear, whose potent hug,

Was feared by all, is now a rug.

Great Caesar’s bust is on the shelf,

And I don’t feel so well myself.

Mr. Guiterman notes that “Line 2 is a reference to the days when billiard balls were made of ivory from elephants or even mastodons.”

©Arthur Guiterman